Creating the Conditions for Practice

I am very new to Dorje Shugden’s practice as I was formally introduced to the Protector only about a month or so ago. It would be hard to write a testimonial when I do not have months and years of practice behind me, but I would still like to seize the opportunity to share a few things related to my practice of Dorje Shugden:

When I first became involved actively with the study of the Lamrim, and as I did further research on the Internet about the Gelugpa teachings and its lineage, I came across the controversy of Dorje Shugden. At first, I searched more to find out what it was about and quickly realized that I just could not make any sense of it AT ALL!

The statements of the Dalai Lama seemed contradictory and it didn’t make much sense at all to me. Then I saw the images of monks demonstrating with banners asking the Dalai Lama to stop…. lying???? Some were even describing him as a… dictator??? Then, he also said that his own teachers were… wrong??

I had been through some parts of the Lamrim by then, and had the determination to study it more as it was answering all of my questions. So I decide to COMPLETELY ignore the topic of Dorje Shugden. Every time I came across it on the Internet, I just did not look at it, did not read anything about it and kept it at the back of my mind, to be explored later when I would have sufficient knowledge and be able to understand the dynamics at play.

I did this because there was one answer from the Dalai Lama to a formal request for clarifications sent by Western Gelugpa monks: “Your main concern should be the study and realization of the 18 volumes of Lama Tsongkhapa”. And so, following the Dalai Lama’s advice, I too set myself to study the Lamrim before entertaining a polemic in my mind.

It was only months later that, through the kindness of my teacher, I was given more detailed explanations and gained more understanding as to why the whole thing seemed to make no sense at all: The very fact that it made no sense indicated that sense is to be found at another level, at a larger scale. Then, instead of undermining my determination to learn and practice, the controversy made it stronger. I realized that His Holiness was acting out of great compassion and with a pure and sincere motivation. His actions are truly remarkable! The controversy is helping many and will continue to help many more!

I run my own business, and very, very soon after having connected with the Dharma and with Dorje Shugden, my business collapsed and all my ventures got suspended or cancelled. ALL! And all within only four weeks. I had 18 employees in October 2008; by the beginning of 2009, I only had two left and we were working only four-day weeks with salary cuts.

Until then, I lived out of a suitcase, travelling 20 days a month, from the States to the Maldives, Dubai, Singapore, China… As such, I would not have been able to study the Lamrim, as I was away most of the time. So, by losing all my jobs, I suddenly had lots more free time at hand. I must say here that I never panicked in this situation. Instead, I took the opportunity at hand to study the Lamrim; I knew that it was a unique opportunity.

My business never collapsed completely and it survived. As a matter of fact, we are now busy working on projects that are spreading the Dharma, and now, even my working hours have been made meaningful!

This is a story I do not talk about openly to just anyone because in the mind of new practitioners, Dorje Shugden is supposed to “protect” us, so how could he have created conditions such that my business collapsed? If some people heard this story, they may not even want to make prayers to Dorje Shugden or do his practice.

Dorje Shugden is a Dharma Protector and his “role” is to create conducive conditions for people to practice the Dharma. In my case, the loss of business created the conditions for me to practice Dharma and as a result, my life is now meaningful, I am happier and, looking at the bigger picture, I have received tremendous help from him. I feel very fortunate.

I wish for my mind to be completely free of any confusion, and may such achievement come to be helpful to others.

~ Eva ~