Author Topic: Abortion: When one does not have the choice!  (Read 14711 times)

Jessie Fong

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Re: Abortion: When one does not have the choice!
« Reply #15 on: June 24, 2012, 06:04:22 AM »
It is easy for us here to give our points of view but if you would ask the victim of rape what would be her choice, what do you think would be her answer?

As it is we have pointed out the following "choices"
a. Abort
b. Keep the child
c. Give up for adoption

Tammy asked if there is another choice, is there?

On another note, what if there was an "accident" and the girl finds out later that she is pregnant, without a partner / husband - she would still be faced with the above.  What should she do then?


Positive Change

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Re: Abortion: When one does not have the choice!
« Reply #16 on: June 24, 2012, 06:36:24 AM »
Well Positive Change,

It really depends on whether the girl knows enough Dharma or not. I don't think it is right to tell her, it is her negative karma that she was raped and then this baby pops out. Well, if she knows Dharma, then it would make the talking a lot easier.

It would be good to reassure her that the baby has a very strong affinity with her, definitely from a previous life. So, it would be good for her to develop this affinity and to take care of this baby instead of aborting. The baby has got nothing to do with the father and there's no need to bring the father into the picture. It takes time and a lot of sensitivity towards the girl's fears and insecurities to get it right.

Indeed Big Uncle... I was sharing from the perspective of the mother and how she would perceive things either from/with a Dharmic standpoint or without. I agree that it is indeed sensitive when trying to advice a friend or family member when such predicaments happen (Given this is far more serious and heavy to be merely called a predicament).

It then puts the onus on us as to how skillful we are to convey the "message" and make them see the best choice they have in their given situation. However, I believe the strong affinity part of it may be a little insensitive as it could be misconstrued as you "deserved" from a karmic stand point. Though true, it may not perhaps be what the fragile "victim" and mother to be would like to hear.

On top of that, no matter how much you try to skirt the issue, the father will forever be "present" and the memory of the rape will associated with the child. It will be hard to separate the two however much understanding of karma one has. One just needs to look forwards and not back... easier said then done of course and I do not wish that upon anyone...

sonamdhargey

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Re: Abortion: When one does not have the choice!
« Reply #17 on: June 24, 2012, 07:34:50 AM »
Abortion is a choice. Abortion is still killing irregardless of how they got pregnant in the first place. It does not matter how it began. What matters most is what the victim will become. Pressure from the society (parents & family included) pre conception of being pregnant not in the correct manner that leads to abortion does not make them any better. The society this days needs to give support to the victims and refrain from abortion instead of pressuring them to abort the child due to selfish reasons.

Aurore

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Re: Abortion: When one does not have the choice!
« Reply #18 on: June 24, 2012, 02:29:05 PM »
I do not agree that one does not have a choice in this case.

If one gets pregnant from rape, from unprotected sex, unplanned family planning or even a one night stand, there's not much difference except for who the father is! The best solution is to accept the karma so that it ends there and not let the negative karma multiply by committing murder via abortion. Of cos not everyone will accept karma.

The victim should consider that this foetus is innocent and to consider keeping a living being alive. If there is resentment, the grandparents of the victim may not be so resentful towards this new life. Either that, give birth and put the baby up for adoption.

What I am saying is that there's always a choice and solution to deal with issues.

RedLantern

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Re: Abortion: When one does not have the choice!
« Reply #19 on: June 24, 2012, 03:32:11 PM »

Various points of views are argued by different individuals.There is no single Buddhist view concerning abortion.Life begins at conception and that abortion,which would then involve the deliberate  destruction of life,should be rejected.The Dalai Lama has said that abortion is "negative" but there are exceptions,abortions should be approved or disapproved according to circumstances.
Modern Buddhist teachers from many traditions and abortion laws in many Buddhist countries recognize a threat to the life of the mother as an acceptable justification for abortion as a practical matter,though it may still be seen as a deed with negative moral or karmic consequences.

biggyboy

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Re: Abortion: When one does not have the choice!
« Reply #20 on: July 02, 2012, 06:55:06 AM »
This is often a subject that conjures a certain amount of emotion.

Technically speaking, any abortion carried out is killing.

Coming back to the subject, all the comments that I have read expressed by friends who are practicing Buddhist who understand dharma, karma and compassion. Maybe we should move one step back and understand the lady who, unfortunately, found herself in this terrible predicament. A raped victim having suffered such trauma would most likely curse and swear for the traumatic experience and would not be very receptive to any talk on karma or keeping the child to allow karma to take its course.

Therefore, in her mind there is only one choice and that is to abort  to save her all the painful memories and resentment she had just gone through and least of all to keep a child as a future reminder of the agony.  Talking to her requires a lot of skill and patience.  There should not be too much preaching on what is right or wrong. In the victim’s present mind, would not comprehend what is right or what is wrong but only resentment. Sometimes compassion also means to look into another’s point of view and to feel their suffering.

In conclusion, abortion is killing and shouldn’t be done for whatever reason. True compassion is when we are able to skillfully convince the victim to change her mind and see the light.  On another note, to bring up the child with spiritual upbringing or offer up the child for adoption.

Dondrup Shugden

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Re: Abortion: When one does not have the choice!
« Reply #21 on: February 12, 2015, 07:39:40 AM »
The power of Buddhism is that it is within our ability to purify our negative karma by doing virtuous acts.

Negative karma arises for the woman to be raped and impregnated, so do we look at this unfortunate incident as a great opportunity for purification and get rid of this negativity never to arise again in this and future lives.

Purification is a form of realising suffering, accept it joyfully and then go forward with exceptional realisations.

NO Killing is one of the vows Buddhist take, as such it will be much suffering through 9 months with realisations of purification and have the baby born and then if go beyond any more suffering to arrange for a good adoption for the child.