Author Topic: Dying  (Read 10541 times)

jeremyg

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Re: Dying
« Reply #15 on: March 03, 2012, 06:34:03 PM »
I agree with everyone here, and thank you very much for contributing. We should definitely use Dorje Shugden's power to help them take a better rebirth.

However this is highly dependent on the person's karma, if the person is the worst person ever (has harmed many in his life etc.) no matter how many DS mantra's we do. No matter what lam rim we put on his head, it will have little effect. One thing it will do is plant imprints in his mind for a future life, but he/she will still have to live out his/her negative karma.

One thing I have to the above points it that, if the person was not a Dorje Shugden practitioner, or not a buddhist for the matter. Then we should not chant DS mantra's. Instead we should chant whatever they believed in, in order not to offend them, so they don't get reborn in the spirit realm. For example instead of saying 'Dorje Shugden, Dorje Shugden, Dorje Shugden.' If the person was christian we should say 'Jesus Christ, Jesus Christ etc. Or recite a christian prayer. If we don't know any then try to not offend them by imposing another religion on them

Let me know how you feel.

Q

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Re: Dying
« Reply #16 on: March 04, 2012, 10:32:29 AM »
When a person is dying what can we do? When a person is dead, what can we do? Do we chant Dorje Shugden's mantra or are there other mantras that are more suitable?

In  the event that there are no Sangha member present during the time of death of a person we love, the following can be done. I learned this from senior members in my Dharma center and it is very helpful.

Main thing is to have a Lamrim text. Place the Lamrim text on the person's head. During this, one can recite protector mantra or Om Mani Pedme Hung, which ever one is most familiar with.

Also, if we have consecrated water, drip it on the person's 5 senses - smell, taste, sight, hearing, forehead. If one has protector mani pill, it can be inserted in the mouth.

The behavior of the people around the place is also very important. Now at the time of death, we should not think about ourselves... of losing a person we care. But to focus on helping them to move on from this life to the next. So family and friends present should not cry, should not scream, weep, whatever that will cause the dying person's mind to be disturbed... dont do. It would be best if all present start reciting mantras, and those not of Buddhist believe, pray their own way. The people present should not touch the dying person's body either... especially at the legs, hands, etc... because it will distract the dying person's mind which may cause them to leave this body from the place they were touched. This is bad because if a person leave from the lower body... that will bring him/her to a lower rebirth. So very important.

After death... a 49 day puja can be done to help the deceased find their way to their next life. This is the period of the Bardo. Depending of individuals, some does for 3 days, or 7 days puja... this is entirely up to the family member.

In most cases, cremation is done. To help the deceased to collect more merits, we can take the ashes and do Ruchuk for the person. Very powerful. We can also insert the ashes into stupas... make tsa tsas with their ashes inside and give it to sanghas or people. These are a few great ways to help the deceased to collect merits, making it easier for them to gain a better rebirth and meet the Dharma again in their next rebirth

Tenzin K

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Re: Dying
« Reply #17 on: March 09, 2012, 07:21:05 PM »
Basically what i understand from some of my Buddhist friends,

When a person is dying what can we do?
We can liberate lives. With the merit gain for this act we are able to dedicate it.
We can even  swear in on having government vegetarian.

When a person is dead, what can we do?
We can do Lord Shugden practice and request Lord Shugden to bring this person for a good rebirth.


Do we chant Dorje Shugden's mantra or are there other mantras that are more suitable?
We can recite Lord Shugden mantra and beside that we can also recite om mani pedme hum.

DS Star

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Re: Dying
« Reply #18 on: March 21, 2012, 02:34:18 AM »
Yes, it is very important to let the dying person leave this life in as peaceful an environment as possible. Even when the person is pronounced as clinically dead i.e. no heart beat, we should still treat the dead person as 'alive' and with care.

When my mother died in the presence of a Hospice doctor, the doctor had kindly helped to wipe my mother's body and changed her clothes. Before the doctor did each action , she would whisper respectfully to my mom that : " Mdm XX, I'm going to wipe your face" or " bend your arm" etc.
As a person of science, this doctor was so aware and concerned about the feeling and sensitivity of the dead that she must had , through her own experience , been convinced that life /life force extends beyond the physical signals of life.

Seeing how the doctor performed the last 'ritual' for my mom was a spiritual awakening experience for me. I sincerely thank this kind doctor for helping my mother and myself.

Kurava, thank you for your post on the humane practice of the Hospice doctor. This is so relieve, I am rejoice that there are such doctors who have respect and compassion towards the dead patient.

I wonder what is the faith of this doctor. Religion belief could be the main factor for this doctor to have this kind of compassionate approach. I have seen many cases of the funeral handler being insensitive or should I say indifferent to their 'clients'. My relatives and friends shared their experiences how these funeral handlers will only be careful when they notice there are family members around.

I read in Dharma books, consciousness of the person who just passed away will leave the body in different time between 1 to 3 days for normal people. So, when the doctor or funeral handlers were washing their bodies, they're aware and may be disturbed. That is why we are advised to touch only the crown or head area and not to touch other parts of the body.

As Buddhist it is very important for us to ensure the people we loved will leave with peaceful mind so that they can go for good and swift rebirth.

yontenjamyang

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Re: Dying
« Reply #19 on: March 22, 2012, 03:42:14 AM »
Amitabha.

One of the prayers we can do is the DS prayer and we can visualize DS coming to bless the deceased. Very similar to some traditions who visualize Chenrizig blessing the deceased and absorbing the deceased into his heart. We can visualize DS bringing the deceased away into a fortunate rebirth.

All that is mentioned is this thread are accurate and should be done if possible.


Jessie Fong

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Re: Dying
« Reply #20 on: March 22, 2012, 01:04:05 PM »
I have been given this advice:

*when a person passes on, tug lightly on the hairs at the crown of his head so that the mind leaves from there.
*put holy water. mani pill and protector rice in his mouth before he passes away
*the holy water, mani pill and protector rice can also be repeated after death
*after death, protector rice and a Lamrim book should be placed on the top of his head - this can be also when the body is in the casked

We can chant prayers (most common is OM MANI PADME HUNG or any other prayers that you are familiar with) and dedicate to the deceased for his swift rebirth in a place of dhrama.

vajratruth

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Re: Dying
« Reply #21 on: March 22, 2012, 04:29:40 PM »


One thing I have to the above points it that, if the person was not a Dorje Shugden practitioner, or not a buddhist for the matter. Then we should not chant DS mantra's. Instead we should chant whatever they believed in, in order not to offend them, so they don't get reborn in the spirit realm. For example instead of saying 'Dorje Shugden, Dorje Shugden, Dorje Shugden.' If the person was christian we should say 'Jesus Christ, Jesus Christ etc. Or recite a christian prayer. If we don't know any then try to not offend them by imposing another religion on them

Let me know how you feel.

I need to clarify about what Jeremy has written. I infer from the above comment that a Dorje Shugden mantra is equivalent to chanting "Jesus Christ" repeatedly? How can that be? Unless you are saying that it is not what prayer the dying is chanting but the state of mind he/she is in by saying a prayer?

Is there a difference in how DS can assist a dying person or a dead person going through bardo, as opposed to say Setrap?

On a lighter note, if the person is dying, and chanting DS mantra will help them, then i guess I may take the risk of "offending them"...since the offense is only for a short time. If they are already dead, then I guess there is no risk of them being offended.

RedLantern

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Re: Dying
« Reply #22 on: March 24, 2012, 01:08:48 PM »
The state of mind at the time of death is extremely important because this plays a vital part in the situation one is reborn into.It is helpful to encourage positive /virtuous thoughts.It is helpful to encourage them to have thoughts such as love,compassion,remembering their Spiritual Leader.
Silent communication and prayer can be helpful.When a person dies,the first part of the body that should be touched is the crown.To rub or tab this area or gently pull the crown hair after a person dies may help the person to obtain a higher rebirth.There are special blessed pills that ca be placed on the crown after death.
A Tibetan tradition,popular in the West is to get part of the remains of the deceased ,blessed and put into statues,tsa tsas or stupas.Making offerings to these or circumbulating them and so on is highly meritorious for the person who has died and for the loved ones.

bambi

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Re: Dying
« Reply #23 on: April 21, 2012, 05:02:52 AM »
What Galen and Ngawang Drakpa posted is what I learned as well. When I first came across Buddhism, an uncle and an aunt of mine passed away and this information was of great help. My grandma was devastated and she cried near the coffin which was what I was afraid of. I had to tell my relatives not to cry as their soul will not rest in peace and they will suffer.

You see, it's the people who are not Buddhists which made it hard as they might not understand what we are trying to do. Hence, we can chant it quietly and dedicate it to them instead.

vajraD

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Re: Dying
« Reply #24 on: April 29, 2012, 05:08:56 PM »
Thank you Galen and Ngawang Drakpa for your clear explanation and guidance for the dying. Is good to know all that as we all need to prepare for it one day be it for our love ones as well as our own self.

In my pass when one of my relative pass away last year we were thought to chant Amitabah mantra continously for 49 days as well as go meatless. I did all that but not sure if that helps. Is with faith that I continue doing all that and also the commitement that my family made.

Thank you again for your useful info.

Positive Change

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Re: Dying
« Reply #25 on: April 29, 2012, 06:58:12 PM »
Dying: An inevitable truth which we spend a whole lifetime running away from. How lucky we are to have the Dharma to make us realize this truth and create the causes for us to be in a situation where we can have complete and utter reliance upon Dorje Shugden to guide us towards our next life...

For it really is not about this lifetime but our future lives that we should be worried about. Even if we cannot remember our past lives or see our future lives, does not mean we cant plan for it!

Thank you all for the postings and giving us the insight on how to deal with the inevitable!

Manjushri

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Re: Dying
« Reply #26 on: May 04, 2012, 05:53:51 PM »
When someone is dying, there are a few things that can be done for him/her. As what was mentioned earlier, one can take vegetarian vows or liberate animals. If you plan on taking say a year's vegetarian vow and dedicating it to the person that is dying, the merits of the entire year is collected in that instance which can be dedicated to them. Why take vegetarian vows or liberate animals for a dying person? Becuase by doing that, you are saving lives, a direct cause to extending one's life. Also, one could do practices of say white tara or medicine buddha, and dedicate it to the dying person.

When a person is dead, we have to put our selfish thoughts of "how am I going to live without you?" aside. Its not about you but them. What we want to assure is that they are able to leave peacefully, and we can chant DS mantra loudly to the person, requesting DS to guide him/her to a good rebirth (of course that depends on karma too), if not, may they meet Dharma and become Dharma teachers in the future. We should not cry, we should not put ourselves with our emotions on top of the deceased because then you'd make it even harder for the deceased to let go and could lead them to be reborn in the lower realms. And all this because you put your feelings selfishly first ahead of the deceased.

Aurore

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Re: Dying
« Reply #27 on: May 05, 2012, 10:36:46 AM »
I have recently experienced someone who was dying and then died. So I am sharing what I know from my experience here. If you are fortunate enough to be near a lama, one can do a divination to see what would be the best prescription to do for this person. If there is none, to add on to what everyone here has provided, this is what you can do for the person before, immediately and after death.

Before death:-
1. Let the person wear a chakra or a Buddha pendant
2. Put holy pills such as mani pills or other pills and even protector rice in a consecrated water and let the person drink this daily.
3. Perform pujas and do daily prayers.
4. Family members should buy statues or any Buddha images to donate.
5. Keep a Buddha statue near the dying person.
6. Take a vegetarian vow. If the dying cannot perform this, the family members can do this to be dedicated to him/her.
7. Perform animal liberation for this person

Immediately after death:-
1. Rub the chakra on the deceased's top of the head and lightly hit the person with a Lamrim book.
2. Gently pull the hair of the deceased upwards.
3. Rub consecrated water on the five points of the face - nose, eyes, ears, crown of head and lips.
4. Bury the person with a Lamrim book placing it on top of the head.
5. Place all the holy pills in his/her mouth.
6. Tell the person as the mind is still around to not worry and go in peace with the Buddha they are affiliated with.

After death:-
1. Offer 100 butterlamps daily for 49 days.
2. Chant 10 malas of Om Mani Padme Hum daily for 49 days.
3. Do meritorious deeds to continuously dedicate merits such as dharma work.
4. Do a puja yearly for this person.

Basically, it's best to do as much as possible before someone passes on because after death, the merits one can receive will be much lesser.

Midakpa

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Re: Dying
« Reply #28 on: May 06, 2012, 07:59:17 AM »
Thank you, Aurore, for the list of things to do for a person who is dying or who is deceased. I wish I had known about the dying process and how to look after the deceased at the time of death much earlier so I could have helped my parents when they passed away. Now all I can do is pray and dedicate merits to them.

My sister-in-law passed away not long ago. She was converted to a Christian just before her death, and her children had a Christian funeral done for her. I felt so helpless and I dared not say Buddhist mantras in case her children became offended. Then I heard that her own niece who is a Buddhist had a Buddhist puja done for her after the Christian funeral.  This is so confusing. Some parents who are not particularly religious themselves may decide to follow their children's religion so that at least the children can do the funereal rites they are comfortable with. If my sister-in-law had not converted, I doubt that the children would be happy to attend a Buddhist funeral. It's so sad.


Dondrup Shugden

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Re: Dying
« Reply #29 on: March 04, 2015, 10:34:27 AM »
Death is inevitable and Buddha had always taught to prepare for death.  In such manner we have to live our lives with Widsom and Compassion so that we gain merits for a swift and good rebirth. 

The only thing that we inherit and take along with us to our many lives in the future is our Karma.  While in this precious human life, we should with wisdom do our best to purify our negative karma to have redemption while we can do so from Buddhist teachings.

However, many people may not even have the merits to meet with the Dharma and as such even at the point of dying, as compassionate Buddhists there are some rituals that we can conduct to call on the Buddhas to lead the soul of the dying to a better place.

Interesting views are contributed here and let us remember them in the event we can be of benefit to some sentient being at point of dying.