Author Topic: What is stopping me from achieving the same results?  (Read 21561 times)

Helena

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 653
    • Email
Re: What is stopping me from achieving the same results?
« Reply #15 on: June 13, 2011, 08:24:24 AM »
So, in essence, no matter how different we all are and where we come from - it doesn't matter.

It does not even matter whether we are young, old, male or female or something in between.

The only reason stopping us from achieving the same results, or even better results is ourselves. And this has really nothing to do with our backgrounds, culture, colour or education.

It has to do with our resolve.

All of us have our flaws, weaknesses and afflictions. No one is free from it and no one is spared from it. That is why we are still stuck in samsara. So, there is really nothing unique or special about our afflictions, negativities, flaws and weaknesses. We ALL have them. Some more than others.

We should stop glorifying these weaknesses, flaws, negativities and afflictions like they are some kind of higher force that deserve so much of our time, adoration, worship, attention, and whatever you want to call it. Because as long as we are feeding it and fueling them every second of the day, we are giving them more power and recognition. We seem to dedicate so much time and effort talking about them - whether it is to ourselves, to our families and friends, through blogs or through our shrinks - we are, in actual fact, crediting them with so much importance in our lives. Worse of all, it is when we actually allow them to rule over us. Thereby, giving them sovereignty over us in all aspects.

Is this really what we want? Of course not!

So, do the opposite. Stop giving them the time, space and day. Stop dedicating every minute of our lives re-living every single agony or pain or fear over and over again in our minds, or by talking about it - end it, shut it and not feeding more to it.

Think of how much time we spend in our heads, paying homage to our weaknesses, afflictions and negativities - just be honest and see within. You'll be surprised to find that almost every other minute is spent talking to those voices in our heads - no matter what names they can come by - be it fear, insecurity, laziness, etc.

If we seriously want to achieve greater results, stop feeding our afflictions with more conversations in our minds, stop giving them more credit by saying how painful they are or how greatly affected you are by them. All these only give them more power. TURN IT ALL AROUND. Do not give them any more power than we already have done so in all our lives.

TIME TO STOP. THE END.


Helena

DSFriend

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 955
Re: What is stopping me from achieving the same results?
« Reply #16 on: June 13, 2011, 12:46:25 PM »
Can a person achieve enlightenment if they solely have faith in the Buddhas and pray diligently??

I don't think so.

The fact that the person has come to learn about the Buddhas and to develop faith in them is a proof that he has to rely on a teacher. Faith is essential, but having a teacher is utmost to help us achieve enlightenment.

diamond girl

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 282
Re: What is stopping me from achieving the same results?
« Reply #17 on: June 13, 2011, 08:10:10 PM »
All the posts on this thread gives me insights and thoughts to contemplate. In my contemplation I cannot help but think how the mind is indeed very powerful to do both negative and positive, and confuse. I do not know how to express what I am thinking and I hope that in expressing my thoughts I do not offend anyone.

In all the knowledge we share here on karma, negative afflictions, etc. and all the correct ways forward, what I read is good theory. I guess what I am trying to say is where are the results of the positive changes and practices. In the post below by Positive Change:

[What is stopping me from achieving the same results?

1. My fear. Fear of getting out of my comfort zone!
2. My resistance. Resistance to change and insecurity of the unknown!
3. My stubbornness. Stubbornness to accept criticism and accepting i could be wrong!

All three of my "reasons" are mere delusions but how does one come face to face with one's greatest enemy... oneself? What helps me I find is the reliance of my kind guru who I have put my faith on and that I trust has only y best interest at heart. Of course it is easier said than done as I still apply the same three delusions even on my guru! However, I do watch myself and i know I need to just "fall" and trust he will catch me.]

I cannot help but think, "So, we come with all the negative karma and habituations only to find a Guru and dump it all on the Guru?" I find this not very responsible. Isn't the point of spiritual practice and learning from a Guru to attain the knowledge and practices to keep ourselves from "falling" and if we do, which I am certain we always will, to pick ourselves up with the changes in our habituation from teachings and new habits? We learn to be responsible for oneself and for others, no?

Again, I do not mean any disrespect, at the end of it all, isn't it actions and results speak louder than theory. What we learn must be put to practice (action) to achieve the attainments and merits (results). Also, we speak of collecting the merits now and change now so that we can attain Enlightenment in the next lifetimes. How about thinking to achieve it in one lifetime and work very hard to have that. I mention this because the mind will use this conversation of next lifetimes as a way to not do more and achieve more this lifetime....

Barzin

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 365
Re: What is stopping me from achieving the same results?
« Reply #18 on: June 14, 2011, 08:15:20 PM »
I think FEAR plays a big part in everyone's life.  Fear of getting old, fear of getting reject, fear of failure, fear of trying, fear of letting go, fear of commitments.. in fact, we have fear in almost everything we do.  We pushes ourselves but things don't go well, the fear sets in again...  The fear of not achieving the result that we wanted.

Therefore, dharma study is so important.  With a guru, it is like having a guide or a teacher guiding, teaching you until you get things right.  Without a guru, dharma texts, dharma videos from various gurus might help, but homework must be done.  There is no such thing as without practicing or learning, enlightenment can be achieved.  When setting our foot onto a spiritual journey, it is vital to eliminate the fear in us and fully believe in the dharma, Buddha and Sangha. It is almost like pushing a "refresh" button.

jessicajameson

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 290
    • Email
Re: What is stopping me from achieving the same results?
« Reply #19 on: June 14, 2011, 10:13:48 PM »
For me there's one thing that stops that change. LAZINESS.

Laziness to get out of my comfort zone.

I don't reinforce my negative habits by talking about it, but by not shifting my butt to change, and thereby just repeating my negative habits over and over again... coz it's easy, convenient and habituated already!!

It's scary. I know in my mind what's right, what's wrong and what I need to clarify. Yet, even knowing so - there is no shift.

I look at myself in the mirror and think: "You big, fat, lazy butt - you're going to end up boiling in a pot of oil in hell".

It's cynical and a bit morbid - but I have so much goodness around me but I choose to not use it for a greater benefit to others.

I read something today which I found SO SO APT (for this thread especially). I don't know who wrote it, I think that it was from some legendary drummer: "The noblest of dreams is nothing without the reality of disciplined behavior."

WoselTenzin

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 249
Re: What is stopping me from achieving the same results?
« Reply #20 on: June 19, 2011, 05:51:37 AM »
For me there's one thing that stops that change. LAZINESS.

Laziness to get out of my comfort zone.

I don't reinforce my negative habits by talking about it, but by not shifting my butt to change, and thereby just repeating my negative habits over and over again... coz it's easy, convenient and habituated already!!

It's scary. I know in my mind what's right, what's wrong and what I need to clarify. Yet, even knowing so - there is no shift.

I look at myself in the mirror and think: "You big, fat, lazy butt - you're going to end up boiling in a pot of oil in hell".

It's cynical and a bit morbid - but I have so much goodness around me but I choose to not use it for a greater benefit to others.

I read something today which I found SO SO APT (for this thread especially). I don't know who wrote it, I think that it was from some legendary drummer: "The noblest of dreams is nothing without the reality of disciplined behavior."

I can relate to what jessicajameson has said. My greatest obstacle to change is also my laziness, attachment to my comfort zone and lack of discipline.   I know all that but it is still a great struggle to get out of it mainly because it the selfishness that cause the reluctance to change to accommodate others and the environment.   

Change is difficult when the selfish mind is strong.  I acknowledge that in myself and to get to the root of the problem,  I find that I have to address my selfish mind.  I believe that as the selfish mind lessen all the rest will fall in place.  I say that because looking at the examples of great masters and saints, they achieve great results because their focus is always outwards towards benefiting others and as such they thing nothing of their own difficulties as long as others are benefited.

triesa

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 609
Re: What is stopping me from achieving the same results?
« Reply #21 on: June 22, 2011, 02:15:49 PM »
Many reasons have already been mentioned by everyone here of how they stop us from achieving the same results.

And all these are very valid reasons, or rather they are valid afflictive emotions that bind us in our current state.

To help anyone better in this, I would suggest that we start  by SETTING SMALLER TARGETS OR OBJECTIVES in whatever we want to achieve, be it enlightenment , a huge task or a big dream....

In doing so, we can achieve these smaller  targets easier which will then propell us to set the next target or level, and so on and so on..
 ........

Understanding our afflictive emotions which set us back is good, but we must also find a practical way to help us to move forward......so as to achieve the same results as others or the buddhas.

Just my two cents opinion...

samayakeeper

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 398
    • Email
Re: What is stopping me from achieving the same results?
« Reply #22 on: June 23, 2011, 12:51:54 PM »
So what is stopping us from sincerely learning the Dharma and achieve results as so many Victorious Ones have done so?

I agree it is laziness. We procrastinate and say that we will start tomorrow but when tomorrow comes, we postponed it again. Our mind is so lazy because we feel comfortable doing what we are used to that when the thought of learning and practicing the Dharma, we pushed it to the back of our mind. And because we think so, our body follows suit. We rather carry on the daily non Dharma pursuits because we think these make us happy and contented. But when the party ended and we departed from friends, we return home alone. And when we wake up the next day we start to chase for the thrill again and again. We tell ourselves that the Victorious Ones are different from us. Are they? Who were they before they became victorious?

WoselTenzin

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 249
Re: What is stopping me from achieving the same results?
« Reply #23 on: June 24, 2011, 06:04:38 AM »
Many reasons have already been mentioned by everyone here of how they stop us from achieving the same results.

And all these are very valid reasons, or rather they are valid afflictive emotions that bind us in our current state.

To help anyone better in this, I would suggest that we start  by SETTING SMALLER TARGETS OR OBJECTIVES in whatever we want to achieve, be it enlightenment , a huge task or a big dream....

In doing so, we can achieve these smaller  targets easier which will then propell us to set the next target or level, and so on and so on..
 ........

Understanding our afflictive emotions which set us back is good, but we must also find a practical way to help us to move forward......so as to achieve the same results as others or the buddhas.

Just my two cents opinion...

Dear Triesa, I like the positive note in your post.  It's true that investigating and contemplating on what is setting us back is the first thing we must do to identify the real source of our lack of results but we must must not stop there.  Otherwise all our investigation and contemplation will come to a naught.  Nothing will change and we will still not progress from where we were.

What you said about setting smaller targets for all our goals initially is surely one practical way to progress forward.  When we achieve these smaller targets, we will progressively expand to achieve higher targets and our success rate will definitely be higher.

If we set unrealistic target for ourselves in the beginning, we may be setting ourselves up to fail.  Therefore, setting realistic target is important to ensure our graduated progress towards our goals and moving forward.