Don't blame Dharma, blame ourselves

[KhedrubGyatso]

If we always blame Dharma, it is a sign we do not know what dharma really is.
In this context, I believe Dharma here to mean all the external things we attribute or blame when we encounter difficulties or when things go wrong. This also includes our practices .
Real dharma is about one's mind which is the mother source for everything we experience, happy or unhappy , right or wrong, pleasant or unpleasant.
When somebody scolds us, that person may be a contributing cause, but the experience of aversion or unpleasantness is happening within us. Since it is inside us, there is the possibility of controlling it and eventually removing it. If the source is coming from external , then we cannot have control. A fundamental reason we assign blame to externals is due to lack of knowledge which result in us adopting wrong views.
To know the real dharma, we need to look inside  ourselves and understand our mind better. We need to know the operation of karma , develop conviction of past , present and future lives, recognize the impermanent nature of things.
If we put effort to study and practice, we will realize that the main object of  blame is  ourselves. It is we, who created  the karma for us to suffer.

[DSFriend]

Dharma is like a magnifying lens, an xray and often times what we see in us is really not that pleasant. Yes Dharma gives us the medicine to heal but very often, people do not want to go further and rather not see and experience the unpleasantness, the mess... so the quick fix is to blame the whole world, crying out "Why God, Why Me!

Will this fix the problem? Obviously not thus there is the saying "play the ostrich."

The question then is how do we skillfully help someone see that life is suffering - the 1st noble truth but to not shy away from it, hate the whole wide world but to accept that this is our own doing. This is extremely difficult to do.. that it all started with us.

[Positive Change]

We do tend to blame everything or everyone apart from ourselves... such is the self cherishing mind. It is through this selfish attitude that most of our non virtuous actions spring from. Sometimes consciously, sometimes not and through habituations.

Hence it is not the Dharma that is to blame if something goes wrong or something bad happens... if we slip and carry on feeding the self cherishing mind we are actually creating the karma for negative things to happen to us. This is NOT created by the Dharma but our individual karma... karma knows no distinction. Karma does not treat a person with Dharma knowledge any different from someone without Dharma knowledge!

Blaming the Dharma is actually yet another manifestation of the self cherishing mind telling us, it is because of what we did not do or not do correctly while in the Dharma that is the cause of our suffering. The law of cause and effect will happen regardless, the difference is, with the Dharma we should realise and curb our negative actions completely as we aim to cut out suffering and not add on more!

So Dharma is actually the voice in our head that is saying do the right thing... all we have to do is listen!

[sonamdhargey]

 If we remain blaming everything that goes wrong including the Dharma, then why study and practice the Dharma? The Dharma practice is to cease the delusions, the three poisonous minds, which are the root of all suffering, as well as the self-centered mind (Ego)

Practicing Dharma is to watch our mind during our daily life and to try to free it from being controlled by delusions.
We blame and criticize others because we do not want suffering but if we don't like suffering then why are we harming others and creating disharmony? That it self makes us unhappy. That very action contradicts itself. What we want and what and what we are doing are the opposite.

[pgdharma]

When things go wrong, we blame others, dharma or any external factors  but not ourselves. We should not blame the dharma but should blame our own karma. When we have a self cherishing mind, we  have a  selfish attitude and this cause our own suffering.

When we have dharma,  we should learn to control our mind, let go of attachments and have a selfless attitude so that we  can be happier  and have less  suffering. All sufferings are self-inflicted and it is within us to get rid of this self inflictions.

[Jessie Fong]

When things do not go the way we feel they should, we are very quick to point out the fault at others, forgetting that in pointing one finger out, we have the other fingers pointing inwards & back at ourselves.  It is very easy to put the blame on others, be it Dharma or otherwise.

Some may blame it on karma; but if so, then why did not take stock of ourselves so that the karma does not open?  We know and accept that what we are today is a result of yesterday.

[Tenzin K]

Strongly agree with DSFriend. Dharma will make us realize and see the real us!

Most of the time we see the ugly side of us and we either don’t how to accept it or don’t want to accept it and the easiest way out is to push all this ugly things to other as a blame.

How can that be true? We are who we are and all this negative quality or ugly things coming from ourselves even if it’s trigger by others but why it has to be us to experience it?

This is good enough to proof that all things happen around us is generated from us and by understanding karma or cause of effect we will understand better that it’s all from our previous action and created such cause.

We should also treat this as opportunity for self-reflection and change ourselves for good and able to be a great vessel to benefit others instead of blaming to cover ourself ego and selfishness.

[ratanasutra]

Don't blame Dharma, blame ourselves : this is the way is should be when something ugly happened with us, i think most of us are aware of it but when we facing the real situation due to our untrain mind so our delusion, anger, jealousy arise and become ignorant about what we have learned and what is should be therefore we feel unhappy and start to look for people fault and put the blame on it so we no need to think nor take responsibility about it as it was came from other people problem not our problem.. the easy way to cover, come out from problem..

 

[biggyboy]

Whenever we do not like to hear something that were being said by another person and happens to be true, our pride and anger arises to protect and cover up our habitual self.  Hence not accepting the fact instead blaming on others or the dharma.  When one blames on dharma that shows the person do not have enough understanding and knowledge of what dharma is all about.

According to Shakyamuni Buddha: "If a person commits an act of good or evil, he himself becomes the heir to that action. This is because that action actually never disappears

Things do not happen to us, we make them happen.  We act in a habitual way. When they do happen that leads us to habitual situations. We made what we are today and experiencing it, and we are at this moment making what we will be and experience in the future...KARMA.  So to change karma means to change our lives right now; that is, the way we think, speak and do things. The best way to positively transform the effects of our past bad karma and create good karma for the future is to rehabituate our actions with conviction and wisdom.  Thus, it is important to arrest our mind and reflect always whenever any uncalled for situation arises. 

[kris]

I live in a country where Buddhism is not very strong, and in many cases, when people are doing Dharma and things does not work out (the "things" we talk about here are mostly samsaric stuffs, like not getting the desired money or relationship, etc), we blame that doing Dharma bring us "bad luck".

I have heard a Lama said before, "Don't blame Dharma. The problem you have already exist BEFORE you join Dharma. Whether you do Dharma or not, the problem is already coming your way." He went on to give some examples, "Some people complaint about the relationship with boyfriend or girlfriend did not 'improve' after doing Dharma; But they didn't study that we are supposed to be less attached, and have projections on how a relationship should be. They think Dharma will solve the problem for them; They didn't know they are supposed to transform their own mind.."

[Q]

Well, Dharma is a teaching to help us improve ourselves, and that definitely has to happen internally. Which is why people whom practices and contemplate deeply on the teachings find a change, or some sort of transformation within themselves... and these changes are associated with a feeling of peace.

We cannot blame others for the source of our troubles, after all, we have the karma to receive it... no point blaming others and create more bad karma out of it. So what we can do is change our perception towards how we view things, and take it as it is, without allowing our negative minds influencing us. It is always because of our negative emotions influencing us that causes us to react to a certain situation badly. When we change how we perceive things and react differently... then others around us will change too.

[Carpenter]

Some people can naturally twisted the meaning of Dharma teaching, and it created wrong views and wrong understand for them, and when they went into the wrong path, wrong direction, they will end up being difficult, more obstacle, then they blame Dharma, they blame that they did not get blessing from learning dharma.

Because of their high ego, they couldn’t accept that they are wrong, they can’t face their real self, that’s why they pushes all these blames away. Their thought of being right is so strong that it even surpasses Dharma. It is indeed sad to see this. But many people out there are like that.

[Manjushri]

The Dharma represents no fault, it is the ultimate truth, for until today, the Dharma, taught by Buddha is stil helping others. If it had no truth, it wouldn't have lasted 2,600 years, reincarnation of high lamas wouldn't take place as they are the ones spreading the Dharma to ten directions, and monasteries wouldn't still be flourishing. The mere fact that it is, shows that the Dharma, is correct.

So,yes, you can choose, to blame the Dharma, or to accept that the things coming to you are self-created, and thus you blame your own actions, but it doesn't mean that nothing can't be done. With every problem there is a solution, and that is the learning and application of the Dharma. What we choose is up to us, we can dwell, or we can blame ourselves, accept and move on. What's stopping us is our ownself and not wanting to do more to alleviate our own problems and sufferings.

[bambi]

I know people who have been practicing Dharma for so many years yet they are the same. They blame the surroundings, people and every little thing. How can that be? Before any of us come across Dharma, we already have our existing problems. Everyone around us going through samsaric activities day in and day out. Learning and practicing Dharma is to help us solve our problems. How can it possibly make it worse? I see young people and old people who are unhappy because they spent so much time to survive and they lost out on all the precious time that they could have done something more meaningful. I read this from Master Cheng Yen's teachings and I find it is really easy to understand.


We're very blessed for being able to learn Buddhism. Nevertheless, because we often do not realize this we don't really cherish having the opportunity to learn the Buddha's teachings.

Dharma can help us understand ourselves better, what habits we have, how we conduct ourselves, and the manner of our speech. When we learn the Buddha's teachings, we'll come to know what habits are good and what habits are bad, what kind of conduct is better, and how we should talk to others. Following the teachings can help us improve ourselves.

Yet when an opportunity comes for us to listen to Dharma talks or read Dharma books, we often let the opportunity slip by as we may feel that we already know the teachings because we have read or heard them before. It seems there is nothing new; therefore, we don't make the effort to learn the Dharma.

http://www.tw.tzuchi.org/en/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=786%3Acherishing-the-opportunity-to-learn-the-dharma&catid=115%3Aspiritual-practice&Itemid=323&lang=en

[Jessie Fong]

It is not right to blame Dharma for when things go wrong.  There are practitioners who are still stuck in their old stubborn ways and refuse to change, choosing to remain quiet and at times acting as if nothing is wrong, not realising that people around them are affected.  Or maybe they know the effects on people around them, they just pretend not to be affected.  How selfish.  Where is their practise?  Is this to be blamed on Dharma?
No, the blame lies on us for not accepting change when it is for our own good.